It is obvious to me why Darnell's article impacted Detroit reader's so much. It was raw, personal, well-written and true. His whole paper was an obvious use of pathos, and he does this by using diction and compare/contrast.
Mr. Gardner used excellent vocabulary throughout his paper but a few words struck me most and added to the strength of his paper. He begins by countering a previously stated argument. He foresees people saying he is a bigot (just like Kwame accused). He counters this by saying my words are drenched in tears -- for my people and my city." The word drenched shows the extent of his sadness. It has weight; it weighs on the heart. He could have simply said "I'm really sad about what's going on in Detroit", but instead he uses a much stronger word that supports the tone of the paper.
Then he says, "While Kilpatrick touts building up dilapidated neighborhoods and tearing down abandoned homes, I cringe as he fails to preserve what little beauty this city still has left." This is a great use of diction and compare/contrast, which I will discuss later. Tout is such a strong, proud word, and the word cringe gives a painful, uncomfortable connotation. Both entirely different words with different meanings. The contrast between Darnell's and Kwame's opinion is apparent.
He goes on to write about the poor education in Detroit and how it is evident that student's are not receiving enough education. He says that the teacher's have a difficult time grading papers because they are not legible. He says, "In fact, one of my peers asked me to proofread one of his essays, and I nearly began to sob halfway through it." He could have chose an alternative, weaker word, but sob has passion. It also shows the extent of his sadness. When he uses words like these, especially sob, it makes his paper so much more personal, which is the reason why his paper impacted so many.
He finishes by saying, "I am one of the many Detroiters who are pleading for Kilpatrick's resignation." If there was confusion about what his purpose was in writing this, he makes it obvious when he says that. He uses the word pleading which has just as much passion as the other uses of diction. Again, he could have used different words, like asking or begging, but those words do not have the same effect as pleading. They are weak words and although they would make sense in the context of the sentence, they would not have been effective. The reader can hear the emphasis on this word. It is not only a good choice of words but it has emotion behind it.
Mr. Gardner used excellent vocabulary throughout his paper but a few words struck me most and added to the strength of his paper. He begins by countering a previously stated argument. He foresees people saying he is a bigot (just like Kwame accused). He counters this by saying my words are drenched in tears -- for my people and my city." The word drenched shows the extent of his sadness. It has weight; it weighs on the heart. He could have simply said "I'm really sad about what's going on in Detroit", but instead he uses a much stronger word that supports the tone of the paper.
Then he says, "While Kilpatrick touts building up dilapidated neighborhoods and tearing down abandoned homes, I cringe as he fails to preserve what little beauty this city still has left." This is a great use of diction and compare/contrast, which I will discuss later. Tout is such a strong, proud word, and the word cringe gives a painful, uncomfortable connotation. Both entirely different words with different meanings. The contrast between Darnell's and Kwame's opinion is apparent.
He goes on to write about the poor education in Detroit and how it is evident that student's are not receiving enough education. He says that the teacher's have a difficult time grading papers because they are not legible. He says, "In fact, one of my peers asked me to proofread one of his essays, and I nearly began to sob halfway through it." He could have chose an alternative, weaker word, but sob has passion. It also shows the extent of his sadness. When he uses words like these, especially sob, it makes his paper so much more personal, which is the reason why his paper impacted so many.
He finishes by saying, "I am one of the many Detroiters who are pleading for Kilpatrick's resignation." If there was confusion about what his purpose was in writing this, he makes it obvious when he says that. He uses the word pleading which has just as much passion as the other uses of diction. Again, he could have used different words, like asking or begging, but those words do not have the same effect as pleading. They are weak words and although they would make sense in the context of the sentence, they would not have been effective. The reader can hear the emphasis on this word. It is not only a good choice of words but it has emotion behind it.
His paper was very powerful and showed that excellent students and writers still exsist in Detroit.
"But I did what many other Detroiters still do on a regular basis: try to uphold the image of our city. "
He definitely has.
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